Monday, December 15, 2008

A Few Things I've Learned...


...While Recovering from a Tonsillectomy:
For those of you who know me, this is what I've been up to for the last week.
For those of you "googling" adult tonsillectomy, like I have been for the past week, I hope to add a bit of humor to the process.
No matter how romantic it sounds, recovering from a tonsillectomy is not all about eating ice cream after you wake up from surgery. Water, good. Anything more solid than that, bad.
Don't be too grumpy towards your spouse. They will come in handy when retrieving your medicine from the counter and mashed potatoes from KFC.
You will feel like a lump. You will not want to do anything. You will get up, go to the door to let your pet outside 2-3 times a day (if they are lucky, and only because they have been whining a very long time) and you will consider this your exercise for the day.
Pets do aid in recovery (as long as they are outside when awake and cuddled up next to you when asleep.
No matter how curious you are, do not look in the back of your throat. Leave this disgusting and dangerous job up to a professional doctor. And...if your spouse starts to get the flashlight out so he/she can look in the back of your throat, exclaim that you suddenly feel better, and there is no need for him/her to look.
When sleeping during the middle of the day, do not leave the T.V. on a talk show. All the loud clapping and thunderous applause will wake you from a previously peaceful sleep for no reason at all, unless you really need to see the newest Oprah episode.
Even though you will feel like a vegetable, I do recommend having music or the T.V. on during the day. Both are quite good at distracting you from the pain.
If a major holiday is approaching, you will not feel like celebrating or decorating. I highly recommend getting practical here. My newest box of kleenex is decked out in a tacky, shiny red background with vintage-looking Christmas ornaments. Perfect. Maybe tomorrow I'll gather all the presents around it.

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